Today i took a nap. But like all naps of mine, this one was 2.5 hours and i woke up feeling like SHIT. feeling like my insides have died out and i'm just a shell. i absolutely HATE this feeling. and i hate how this isnt the first time. i hate how i dont have enough time now to study (just realized that ad cal requires more of time that i dont have) and i hate how that is my fault. i hate hate hate. i just want to sleep. no i dont want to sleep. but now im not gonna have a good sleep at night. hate hate hate. >:'(. there just made a new emoticon. sigh. i believe u can still be mad even though you have no right to.
i hate how SLOW i happen to study. i hate how much time i also waste because im not built to study for 2435435879 hours at a time. i hate being stuck in this situation.
i had a dream where ALL the lightbulbs in our house slowly fused themselves out and we never bothered changing them until the last one finally went out and we had to try to find alternative light in the darkness. MY GOD IM NOT AROUND THE HOUSE ALL THE TIME TO DO IT MYSELF! i also hate how the little time i spend in the house i have to use for washing dishes. today was the 2347478894375th time i washed the dishes. i dont care if there are people out there having it SOMUCHMOREWORSE than me. my taking-crap-from-other-people meter is FULL.
i also hate how i woke up and it was DARK. i felt like i wasted AN ENTIRE DAY.
im also going home for christmas. right now i havent quite had the time to process that in my mind. because all it means to me is packing and spending 345897 hours TRAVELLING.
oh i also hate how my computer works only for 5 minutes in a day.
i think im travelling on december 31 back here. spending new years travelling. imsosad.
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